"it's not fun being sick"

After experiencing some abnormal pain and symptoms of something a bit more serious than just eating poorly prepared food, I listened to the advice of my friend and went to a clinic to get tested for malaria. Though I take prophylactics which are supposed to prevent malaria, the test results were positive. I took the treatment, which spanned 5 days. One week after I finished the treatment, my body again showed the distinctive signs and symptoms of malaria. Again, I traveled to the clinic and the test showed a small count of the malaria parasite. This time, I was given a much stronger dose of the initial tablets plus some medicine to take after. I am now taking treatment that will last 16 days.

The malaria parasite is remarkably similar to the way in which I deal with many of my sins. It begins small and can't visibly be detected. For one or two days though, I feel guilt and shame. Then life returns to joy and content. After a few days, I am plagued with an even stronger sense of separation from God and bitterness. I repent, although I keep some things hidden, but assure myself I feel fine. Then one week later, the truth and gravity of the situation abruptly attacks my heart. I am reminded of the sin I committed two weeks ago. I need a stronger dose of treatment. I recognize my sin, repent, and commit to change. This is a long process but the result is spiritual growth and maturation, and a proper formation of character.

Being sick definitely isn't fun, as my friend honestly observed as I repeatedly sauntered to the pit latrine or supported myself to stand up. Receiving proper treatment, including medicine, comforting friends, rest, and nutrition leads to positive change. With such treatment, my body will become stronger because I develop some immunity to the parasite. Likewise, sinning isn't good. But it is through sin that we recognize our faults and in which areas of life we are separating ourselves from our Creator. And just as importantly, if we receive the proper treatment, we become more like Jesus.

side note: This blog is dedicated to Jenny Csinos. Her envelope marked "read if you get sick" revealed a letter that comforted me as I lay in pain in my bed. And upon her request, I've written this blog about being sick, though I've left out much of the details because I don't think it's necessary. If you want more information, talk to my parents.